The Tragedy of The Baltimore Colts: a "National Foodball League" Prequel

by Mike “Old Bay” Lunsford, Editor-In-Chief of the Great Geek Refuge

As I sat down to write the next installment of the National Foodball League Project, I tried to determine how I would organize it and which city/team would be next. Will I do it by division? Will I do it by proximity to the other cities I’ve done? The answer to those questions is a resounding “I’m not sure, we’ll see how it goes.” For now? It looks like I’m gonna stick to physical proximity, which means outliers like Dallas in the NFC East and Miami in the AFC East will come later in the series as I get to those parts of the country.

Regionally, Baltimore is in the same area as Washington, D.C., Philadelphia and New York. All 3 of those cities have their teams in the “East” of their respective conferences. However, when it comes to Baltimore, they are aligned with the AFC North. It’s an odd placement with the justification of existing rivalries, just like Dallas and Miami staying in their old divisions. The previous Baltimore tenant, the Colts were members of the East division. But there’s 2 factors to consider: 1. The Ravens are not the first Baltimore football team and 2. Their relocation from their prior city explains away the divisional oddity.

Before the Ravens came to Baltimore in 1996, they were the Cleveland Browns and had established rivalries with Pittsburgh and Cincinnati. When the NFL realigned to 4 divisions (North, South, East and West) the old AFC Central division became the new AFC North. In fact, I just learned this myself so I figured I would share it with you, take a look at this quote about the realignment:

Legally, three teams from the AFC Central (Cincinnati, Cleveland, and Pittsburgh) were required to be in the same division as part of any realignment proposals; this was part of the NFL's settlement with the city of Cleveland in the wake of the 1995 Cleveland Browns relocation controversy.

Normally, I delve into just the city and its relationship with food, not so much the team or history of the football teams themselves. However, this was not as simple “Cleveland doesn’t want us and Baltimore does. BYE!” Former Cleveland owner Art Modell was less than honest in his dealings with the city in regards to his desire for a new stadium and announced the relocation statement from BALTIMORE. He said that Cleveland didn’t have the political will or funding to get a new stadium. To add insult to injury, this announcement was made mid-season and the following day, the city overwhelming approved the tax issue to remodel old Cleveland Stadium. So Modell is a jerk. He stole the Browns from Cleveland, but what does that have to do with Baltimore? It’s not their fault, they just wanted a football team! Well…

The reason that there even had to be a second Baltimore football team, the tragedy of the Baltimore Colts if you will, warranted my attention. The legal statement above raises some questions: why would there need to be a legal ruling for something like that? Because in 1996 when Cleveland owner Art Modell decided to move his team to Baltimore, the NFL had to step in to avoid a catastrophe, one that had happened the last time Baltimore football was involved in a relocation plan.

Back in the 80s, former Colts owner Robert Irsay moved the team to Indianapolis under the cover of night . The fact that Baltimore would be the recipient of a new team in almost the same way they lost theirs seemed disgusting. But because of how Irsay did Baltimore dirty all those years ago, the NFL stepped in with the Cleveland to Baltimore move.

The initial plan was for Cleveland to move to Baltimore, stay the Browns and go about their business. Baltimore football fans balked at Modell's intention to rechristen his team as the "Baltimore Browns." As badly as they wanted to see the NFL return, they were uneasy at the prospect of taking Cleveland's football history in the way Irsay had taken the Colts' legacy with him to Indianapolis.

If you ever wanna piss off an older Baltimore resident, show them this picture.

What exactly happened to the once proud franchise of the Baltimore Colts? Founded in 1953, the Colts quickly made a name for themselves as a force to be reckoned with. They beat the New York Giants in the 1958 NFL Championship (pre Super Bowl era) in what is often called “The Greatest Game Ever Played.” They were a consistent challenger for the NFL Championship, winning 3 NFL Championships and losing 1. With quarterback Johnny Unitas and coach Don Shula, the Colts were one of the top teams in the new NFL/AFL merged league. They competed in 2 of the first 5 Super Bowls, winning one of them. Then 1972 came along, and Chicago businessman Robert Irsay took ownership of the team. Irsay would be the reason why the Colts left Baltimore like thieves in the night.

Well, Irsay wasn’t a complete devil in the matter (even though his own mother called him “the devil on earth“), just a drunken, lying dick. The city of Baltimore didn’t make things easy on the tenants of old Memorial Stadium: the Colts and baseball’s Orioles. They wouldn’t facilitate improvements to the stadium, they wouldn’t help in building a new stadium and they even went so far as to change the city’s charter to prohibit new stadiums being built with public funds. But don’t let this make you think Irsay was some misunderstood businessman. Here’s a direct quote from the Baltimore Sun

In Baltimore, he quickly developed a reputation as a meddlesome, impetuous team owner given to drunken fits of rage… Irsay's persona in Baltimore, where he is remembered best for drunken public appearances and unstable management -- seven coaches in his 12 seasons -- that drove away fans from a franchise that had been among the most popular in sports.

"He didn't play fair with us. He didn't tell us what he was doing," former Mayor of Baltimore and Governor of Maryland William Donald Schaefer said. "The suddenness of pulling out at night -- that was too much."

So, Baltimore didn’t make it easy on Irsay or the Orioles ownership team for that matter. But Irsay lied to city and state officials about his intentions, about his plans and would have drunken shouting matches with reporters claiming he wasn’t trying to relocate when everyone knew he was.

Here’s Irsay (left) telling Baltimore Mayor William Donald Schaefer he’s not moving the team. His quote: “Does this smell like Indiana????”

In the end, Robert Irsay ditched the city in the middle of the night to move to Indianapolis with everything: all the gear, the trophies, records, the colors and the name (which is a nod to the areas storied connect to horses). To make matters worse, the city of Indianapolis was integral in helping facilitate this dirty deed. In fact, Colts officials are proud of this fact, adorning their offices in Indianapolis with pictures of the Mayflower trucks who helped move the team like they were some sort of liberators. Barf.

So, when Cleveland owner Art Modell decides to “pull an Irsay” The NFL was like “not so fast, chief.” Well…not so much the NFL but the countless lawsuits that came from the city of Cleveland as they showed that Modell was a lying sack of shit, too. Essentially the only thing that would be moving to Baltimore were the players, coaches and their contracts, making the Ravens an expansion team more or less. All colors, trophies, records, stats, etc would remain in Cleveland and the Browns would pull a Captain America and be in suspended animation until new ownership and a stadium was established.

Let it go, let it go! Wait…wrong frozen Disney character.

In the end, the heartache and borderline criminal business practices of both Irsay and Modell worked out well for Baltimore. The Ravens have become a force to be reckoned with in the AFC, arguably a bigger rival with the model-of-consistency-Steelers than either the Browns or Bengals. Baltimore has been much more consistent than Cleveland or Cincinnati, contending for a Super Bowl birth nearly every year. They’ve brought home 2 Lombardi trophies, surpassing the 1 win the Colts had, and are currently tied with the prior Baltimore team for total Super Bowls wins. But Indianapolis had the legendary Peyton Manning who set a ton of records and won them their first championship in Indianapolis. At this point, they’ve actually been in Indy longer than they were ever in Baltimore. To follow up Manning, they drafted the highly touted Andrew Luck. However, Luck had to cut his career short due to injuries. The irony of him leaving the Colts unexpectedly before the season started is not lost on me.

Baltimore? Bitter? No…not them.

I hope you guys enjoyed this dalliance from the normal format of the Foodball League articles. Sometimes you see a story and it needs to be told. Since I already made the reference to Star Wars in this article, think of this history lesson as a prequel to the actual “National Foodball League” Project: Baltimore article which you can read right here.